This informative article could be
placed under three different categories: legal,
family, or children.
I am placing it under
The "Best Interest" of The Child :
Redefined by the " Federal and State"
Goverment. The Biblical Perspective of
I am a paralegal by profession.
However, I am also forced made "natural" mother by
a simple judicial act by the State Juevnile system
terminating my parental rights just because
they believed to do what was in the "best
interest" of my now twenty-four year old daughter,
Rebecca Annalen Wesson.
I am not Rebecca's "birth"mother. I am
offended by the Adoption industry to refer
we "natural"mothers as some one with what Gork in
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine would refer to
as "womb-to-rent" and calling us "birth" mothers.
I am more offended by people who are not
ordained by the Lord Our God, to be parents made
parents. If it was not meant to be, it was not
meant to be.
This article presents only the facts on
State's Child Protective Services which in
conjunction work side by side with State and
Private Adoption agencies, to provide
infertile couples with children.
We can look at this in two perspective
ways: 1) by the legal standpoint and 2) the
I will praise thee: for I am
fearfully and wonderfully made: Marvellous are
thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
My substance was not hid from thee, and when
I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in
the lowest parts of the earth.
did see my substance yet being unperfect: and in
thy book all my members were written, which in
continuance was fashioned, when as yet there was
none of them. (Psalms
No where in the Sacred scripture
does it santify or approve of an earthly adoption.
There is no biblical evidence to support this.
It does support a Spiritual
adoption. This refers to as us all being branches
grafted in to the Family of God, because we are
all of the same human family and
descendants of Adam and Eve.
The Royal Adoption refers to us
being being restored to our natural state before
the fall of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.
That is the State of Grace.
The Adoption, Child Protective
Protection Services re-define the word
The definition of Adoption is
"to take and make as one's own". This entitles the
child which is legally adopted to have and hold as
the same rights as any of the other natural
children do in the family.
The difference is this: The adoptive
parents can not say "this is my son or daughter,
James and Jennie", because neither James or Jennie
is their natural son or daughter.
The adoptive parents must assert in their
dialog with others, "this is my adoptive son or
The fact remains that these people did not
create or did the "adoptive" mother give birth to
the child. This is not their child by
"consanguinity" which means " related by blood"
and "related by ancestory".
The relationship between "adoptive" parents
and their "adoptive" children, rather adult
adoptees want to face it or not is one that is
created by a judicial act and by the state
adoption laws in which the state they live in.
This relation between "adoptive" parents
and their "adoptive" child is known as one
established by "infinity" which means by
marriage or a judicial act in a
court of law.
The "Best Interest" Of The
'THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD IS MEETING
HIS/HER PHYSICAL, PSYCHOLOGICAL, MEDICAL, PRIMARY
EDUCATION AND SPIRITUAL NEEDS.. PROVIDING
EMOTIONAL STABILITY, PROTECTING HIS/HER LEGAL
RIGHTS AS WELL AS ASSURING SAFE HOUSING, FOOD,AND
CLOTHING TO THE BEST OF OUR ABILITY. SO THAT THE
CHILD WILL ACHIEVE TO THE BEST OF THEIRS."
These basic and fundamental needs are best
met by the "Natural" parents. Basic needs of life
are Shelter, Food, Clothes, Health Care, and
Education and if the child has special needs.
The special needs must be absolutely met to
ensure the special needs child grow up to
be able to take care of his/her own self.
The Special Needs include: special
education under an Individual Education
Program for Special Needs children, and
that the "natural" parents teach the child who has
"special needs" his or her life-skill, independent
living skills, and psycho-social skills.
Only if The Parents ask for social
services through an authorized Child Welfare
Service, must CPS workers become involved.
It is only natural for a mother and father
to want the best for their child or children. If
the parents ask for assistance it does not show
that they are not fully capable of having care,
custody, and control of their minor children. It
shows that they want only the best for their
children and they realize they need help with
It is not a weakness to ask for help when
one needs help. It is a sign of strength rather
The weakness lies within the parents when
they don't admit they need help and think they can
take the bull by the horns and look it straight in
the eye and deny that there is anything wrong with
their child or children as the case may be.
When a parent does seek out help and
assistance from Child Welfare Agency. It does not
give a licenses for that Child Welfare Agency to
come in run the parents life and that of the child
as well. It does not give the CPS worker the right
to dictate to the parents what they must and must
not do and what they can and can not do, with
their child or children.
Even as parents we all need a little help
with raising our children to become "highly
effective" adults one day. We as "parents" if we
don't admit this than we seriously need to examine
ourselves and ask ourselves are we "highly
Hillary Rodham Clinton wrote "It takes a
Village to Raise a Child". WRONG Senator
Clinton! It does not take a "Village" it takes a
"highly effective" parent or parents to raise
"highly effective" adult children now-a-days.
The Signs of A Dysfunctional
I do not know too many people accept a
handful that did not come from one type of
dysfunctional family or other.
I most certainly did. I, myself, was
adopted shortly after my birth in 1955.
name was changed to reflect I was a part but not a
welcome part of a "natural" family.
My adoptive name was a reflection of a
family member that was not actually a relative of
My "adoptive" mother did her best to raise
all six of us, -which included five of her own
natural children- to the best of her ability. She
was to say the least in part a "mommy" and the
other part a "mother". So half and half is not all
She was young when she married my adoptive
father in May of 1943, and approximately 10 months
later after she and my adoptive father were
married she became pregnant with my late
brother,Larry, in March of 1944.
Larry was born in December of 1944. My
adoptive father was off at war in Germany when
Larry was born at Fort Benning, Georgia.
Larry was five months old when World War II
ended and my adoptive dad got back from the war.
My adoptive mom lived with my adoptive
father's parents, in which case I loved very much.
They did treat me as "one of their own" grand
My adoptive father attended Law School in
Lexington, Virginia from 1945-1948 and in December
of 1948, my adoptive mom became pregnant with my
second brother, Stanton King. She gave birth to
him in Birmingham, Alabama, where they lived close
to my grandparents.
Well in 1951, my adoptive parents moved
from Alabama back to Georgia, in between Alabama
and Georgia in May of 1951, my adoptive mom became
pregnant with my late oldest sister, Lawreen, and
she gave birth to her in Atlanta, Georgia in
August of 1952.
Now between 1945-1947, my adoptive mom had
a miscarriage & in between 1950-1951, right
before she got pregnant with my late sister,
Lawreen, she had a miscarriage.
I was adopted when my late oldest brother
was nearly 9 years old, my second brother was only
7 years old, and late oldest sister, was nearly 3
The other members were not even born yet.
They came after me. One being born in September of
1956 and the other in August of 1965.
My youngest sister, brother, and myself
were all born in the State of Maryland.
My "adoptive" parents always argued in
front of us. Sometimes my "adoptive"mom would come
back and ask us if my "adoptive" father and she
were to divorce who would we want to live with?"
My answer was my"adoptive" father. They
never did divorce and she died in October of 1976
of dreaded cancer of the pancreas and he died in
March of 1994, of alcoholism.
He died three months later after burying my
step mom, Annie, who died of congestive heart
failure in December of 1993.
Both "adoptive" parents were born and
raised down in the Southern United States.
My "adoptive" father was born in Talledge,
Alabama and My "adoptive"mother is Century,
My "adoptive" father was born in a large
family. Three brothers and One sister. The
youngest brother is dead and so is the only girl
in the family. They died within two months of each
other in 2001.
My "adoptive" mom was raised in a family of
three. One sister and one brother. I think only my
aunt, is still alive. My Uncle, -her brother-died
of cancer in 2000.
My uncle's only child, a daughter, Lynne,
was born in 1958 and died in the late 1990's of
What made my"adoptive" family dysfunction
was the fact that both "adoptive" parents had to
embrace the high rolling society of Washington
D.C. and they had to do as their comtemporaries
did, take up drinking and smoking.
With that, came my "adoptive" mom's
addiction to "valium" and drinking a lot alcohol
and smoking cigarettes to make her look more
This she did to fit into the high society
of Washington Socialites.
My "adoptive" parents were trying to keep
up with the Jones' so to speak. This is
something no one can do because material
possessions does not bring us happiness.
My "adoptive" father drank, and then after
he lost my "adoptive"mom in 1976, and nearly lost
his life due to a diabetic coma and he pulled
through stopped drinking for a number of years.
He started to drink again and never stopped
drinking after my oldest sister, Lawreen, was
diagnosed with cancer of the ovaries in 1980. She
did not succumb to it until February of 1984, when
she lost her battle.
My "adoptive" father did stop drinking from
1982-1984 and then when he found out his oldest
"natural" daughter was dying of cancer of the
ovaries that is when he continued to drink and
I say "adoptive" father because he was an
adequate provider of what his family needed and he
worked very hard. However, he was never there for
his children. None of us.
There is a vast difference between being a
"father" and a "daddy" to one's children. The
difference is not so much how much time you spend
with your children, but what do you do with your
children that is allotted to you.
It is quality not quanity here that
Most summers were spent with my "maternal"
grandmother, adoptive siblinlgs, and "adoptive"
mom down south in Goodway, Alabama, where she had
On the way down to Alabama, we would stop
by and see the various relatives.
to stay with them, stay one night and then be on
Rarely did my "adoptive" father come with
us and I have only vague recollection of the
entire family being together accept on holidays.
My"adoptive" parents even marred our
holidays with their perpetual drinking and arguing
in front of us children.
To this very day, my second brother, Stan,
does not celebrate Thanksgivng, Christmas, or
Easter. He has vivid recollection of how our
parents destroyed those holidays. He would just
rather not relive the past.
Anna and I have been able to move forward
only with extensive psyco-therapy which helps us
to understand our past and not repeat the same
mistakes with our children.
Our Best Interests would have served
if someone would have taken us a way from our
parents. Oh well, I would have become an orphan
The only thing my "adoptive" parents did
for me is teach me how to take care of myself.
They did not pass the buck on to some stupid
agency that handles mentally and learning disabled
adult child, as my own daughter, Rebecca's
adoptive parents did to her.
My adoptive parents did not seek to
retain my legal guardianship as Rebecca's
did to her. She had no knowledge of the fact that
her civil rights were being violated. She just
assumed it was in her Best Interest. It is
I learned my psyco-social skills,
independent living skills, and life-skills from
those people who had the responsibility of doing
so rather than by an agency because adoptive
parents don't want to do it themselves.
Futhermore, my "adoptive"parents did not go
down to Social Security once I turned 18, and file
for Social Security Supplementary Income for me so
they would not have to give me any financial help.
I filed on my own with the medical advice
from psychiatrist and therapists. I was never told
that if I did not apply myself there was not
anything I could not do within reason.
My "own" daughter, Rebecca's, "adoptive"
parents did exactly the opposite. They convinced
her she was so developmentally disabled that she
was severely limited into what she could and could
Not exactly very encouraging and positive.
The Highly Effective parent does not
do those kinds of things to their children i,e,
natural or adoptive. They teach them everything
they need to know, and they do not pass the buck
on to some stupid agency to do it for them in
which case they were suppose to do.
If Adoption is so good. Then why are
so many more Adoptive parents screaming
WRONGFUL Adoption years later and trying to
reverse their adoptions and throw the children
they promised to "make and take as their own" back
into the Child Welfare System.
In some states- some adoptive parents are
allow to file a law suit and sue the state
adoption agency for whence they adopted their
child and collect torts on them.
Torts refers to a civil suit whereas monies
are awareded to the plaintiffs because of a
willful act of wrong doing and lack of closure on
the part of the other party.
What is Adoption now a bi-lateral
contract between two consent parties: 1- The
Adoption Agency and 2- The Adoptive Parents?
Did anyone ask the child if the child is
able to speak for him or herself what do they
consider is in their "best interest", especially
in the cases whereas Child Protective Services get
involved? No, noone did and will ever do, unless
the laws change for the real interest of the child
Ask any child of any age who do they wnat
to be with and they will say, "Our Mom and Dad".
They do know the difference between "Natural " and
"Adoptive" and no one can brain wash them
Some children like my daughter did not care
if she did not have everything. All she knew is
that she wanted to be my second ex -her dad- and
me. She knew she would probably had grown up
differently, which is the truth.
She did confront her "adoptive"parents and
tell them "You know, you are not my "real"
parents. - Lucie and Roy is."
Lucie, by the way is my adoptive name.
Only my close friends and boyfriends know me
by my "natural" name -Karissa.
It is this name I am known by and only my
adoptive family calls me "Lucie".
I did reprimand my daughter because
although I do not believe in adoption, or any
state involvement with the family unless
absolutely established that they abused and
neglected the child so badly, that they need to be
removed for their "natural" parents care, custody,
and control, that their natural parents have the
absolute right to raise their own children the way
they see fit and proper to do so.
I reprimanded Rebecca because she appeared
ingrateful towards what her adoptive parents did
for her. I explained in the simplest of terms she
must apologize to them because she showed them
I too was more or less reprimanded by a
girl-friend of mine because she said, "Rebecca was
correct in telling her adoptive parents what she
I did not disagree with her, it was the way
Rebecca did it that I did disagreed, as Rebecca
was placed up for adoption in 1983 and adopted in
1984 at the age of 5 years old.
CPS, the adoptive parents, and all the
other interfering busybodies tried to brain wash
her into telling that the adoptive parents were
her mom and dad. She knew differently.
Through the years they even tried to poison
her mind against her dad and me. This she did not
buy. She refused to believe all the
BULLSHIT lies that CPS, The Adoptive
parents, and all the other interferring
busybodies tried to feed her about what EVIL
and BAD people we are.
In fact, it is the Adoptiveparents
are evil and insecure and usually the adoptive
parents are insecure because the adult adoptee
will want to know about his or her natural
parents and so forth and eventually if at all
possible reunite with their "natural" families.
The "Best Interest" of the Children is best
served by 1- reunification between the "natural"
parents and their children. Thus the damage in
which adoptive child go through with & by the
Adoptive Child Syndrome will never happen
to the child.
2- The State does not interfere
in the private lives of it's citizens and the
raising of the citizens children.
3- If the
parents do ask for assistance. The parents are
given the assistance with the understanding it is
them that asked for the help and when they want to
rescind the contract, the State CPS agency will
butt out of their lives and affairs and not
interfere anymore into their private lives.
More money needs to be alotted to the
States for reunification purposes rather than for
judicial purposes for terminating the rights of
the "natural" parents and freeing the child or
children up to be placed up for adoption.
Younger children may or may not bounce back
from being legally severed from their "natural"
mother and fathers care, custody, and control.
They may very well be able to bond with someone
However, older children and likewise the
parents whose rights have been terminated do not
bounce back from this judicial act.
Older children may resent their new
caretakers, and not bond. They do know the
difference and will come later on looking to
reestablish that bond which was so cruelty ended
by an unnecessary act of law.
The best thing that could possibly happen
is when the child gets of a lega age . He or she
can bring a class action suit along with other
children who became victims of CPS and were taken
away from their "natural" families and CPS be made
to explain rather the adult children agree or
disagree with CPS why they did what they did and
thought it was in their"best interest".
These adult children can then demand for an
explaination that suits their needs, "WHAT MAKES
YOU THINK YOU KNOW WHAT IS IN MY BEST INTEREST?"
WHO DIED AND LEFT YOU TO PLAY GOD?". Thus the
angry voices of all these adult children of CPS
and of adoption will finally be heard.
The Natural family is one created by
God and Nature and not by a judicial act and the
adoption laws of any state.
As two psychiatrist told me once:
Children Belong with Their
Parents are defined as the ones who give
birth to the child through nature means not by an
act of adoption.
Karissa Elizabeth Anne Lowell